—after All My Friends Are Superheroes by Andrew Kaufman
I am The Itinerant
with the ability to bilocate,
using the power of Zoom or a plane
and a passport that commands xenia.
After a year of teaching and a semester
of on-and-off regional conflict,
I unleash my power and scatter myself
across the Northern Mediterranean.
I manifest in Milan,
meandering through Chinatown
on my way to Duomo di Milano.
Then I blink into a bed
in bohemian Trastevere, Rome,
on a sunny evening…
…video conferencing
with writer friends back in Doha—
the clink of silverware audible
from the al fresco diners below me.
Later, I warp to Valletta, Malta,
climbing three flights of stairs
that narrowly wind upwards…
…to discuss success via Zoom
with a student in Gaza
who is cobbling together her life
after a missile sundered her home.
Afterwards, I abscond around Europe for several weeks.
Dear You,
On a train from Milan to Rome to visit Vatican City then a train to Bologna to catch a bus to the City of San Marino back to Bologna to catch a Lufthansa flight to Nice (with a layover in Munich) to ride a train to Monaco then a flight to Barcelona (with a layover in Munich) to catch a bus to Andorra la Vella then a flight to Malta (with one final layover in Munich)—like Odysseus fated to visit microstates before voyaging back to the US.
—The Itinerant
Next, a few days back in Doha
to prepare my gifts, a Silk Road courier
at the onset of a return journey…
…before transposing to the Midwest,
renting a car to tend family and friendships,
a shepherd visiting their transatlantic flock.
Finally, I board a plane,
weeping after one-too-many Old Fashioneds
in the airport lounge—
the side effects of a decade in transit.
Before I know it, I have bilocated back to Doha,
staring at the Katara Towers’ kaiju mandibles—
slipping back into my secret identity…
…of a mild-mannered expat English lecturer.
Comic generated using ChatGPT
Photo by Eduard Delputte on Unsplash
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