Message 1
Attention! This is an imperative message regarding one of your umpteenth accounts.
We have detected suspicious activity—incognito black hats whispering in a remote warehouse on the periphery of your online existence—your account is teetering at the edge of Cryogenian deep-freeze oblivion! You can ignore your friends, ignore your family, ignore fragile work-life balance, forget health, neglect financial futures, and let the planet spiral unchecked toward environmental entropy, but please do not, do not, do not ignore this message!
To avert disaster, press 1 (as in DEFCON 1) to speak to our security department, an extension of the UN Peacekeeping operations stationed in a guarded mountain shrouded in mist, for your top-priority protection. Failure to act could result in permanent, irreversible, chthonic restriction, so act now to sidestep the butterfly-winged maelstrom of modern inconvenience.
Message 2
Greetings, citizen. This is an important phone call
regarding the upcoming historic election.
As we approach holy hallowed voting day,
it is crucial that you stand with a candidate.
Regarding the upcoming hysteric election,
the fate of the free world is at stake.
It is crucial that you stand with our candidate
who is committed to making changes.
At stake is the free world’s fate,
and your individual voice matters.
Who else is committed to making changes,
creating jobs, or ensuring safety for all?
Demand your individual voice matter!
If you believe in a brighter possible future,
creating jobs and ensuring safety for all,
then get involved in the campaign.
If you believe in a brighter impossible future,
press 1 on your keypad to learn more,
then get involved in the campaign.
Remember, your vote is your power!
Press 1 on your keypad to learn more
because, citizen, this is an important robocall.
Remember: your vote is y/our power
as we approach holy hallowed voting day.
Message 3
hello there—
hope
that all is well,
my dear—
you are receiving
a very personal
message,
not just
any call—
but a call
with starry-eyed
admiration
please listen,
carefully—
you are the
most incredible
i wanted
you to know
that—
i do not
know
if you feel
the same way,
but—
your smile
lights up
my world—
grateful
every day,
that you are
in my life—
that i wake
early,
sweet face
laid close—
if you want
more honeyed
words,
find me
after work—
remember—
i am somewhere
waiting—
out
in the world—
come find me—
like a diamond
in the desert—
Photo by Rodion Kutsaiev on Unsplash
opusculum 